This last weekend a fellow member of the infertility blogger community went into premature labor and gave birth to her daughter at just 22 weeks. A precious angel gone as quickly as she came.
This fellow blogger is someone I have never met, but would consider a friend just the same. She and her husband were blessed with a successful IVF cycle earlier this year. Just one month ago our community celebrated with her at the news they were having a baby girl. Today there are no words, only confusion and a horrible aching for my friend's loss.
When this friend first started blogging she posted this statement she had heard from another member of the IF community:
This fellow blogger is someone I have never met, but would consider a friend just the same. She and her husband were blessed with a successful IVF cycle earlier this year. Just one month ago our community celebrated with her at the news they were having a baby girl. Today there are no words, only confusion and a horrible aching for my friend's loss.
When this friend first started blogging she posted this statement she had heard from another member of the IF community:
"What do I think God meant when he gave me infertility?
I think he meant for my husband and I to grow closer, become stronger, love deeper. I think God meant for us to find the fortitude within ourselves to get up every time infertility knocks us down. I think God meant for our medical community to discover medicines, invent medical equipment, create procedures and protocols. I think God meant for us to find a cure for infertility.
No, God never meant for me not to have children. That's not my destiny; that's just a fork in the road I'm on. I've been placed on the road less traveled, and, like it or not, I'm a better person for it. Clearly, God meant for me to develop more compassion, deeper courage, and greater inner strength on this journey to resolution, and I haven't let him down.
"Frankly, if the truth be known, I think God has singled me out for a special treatment. I think God meant for me to build a thirst for a child so strong and so deep that when that baby is finally placed in my arms, it will be the longest, coolest, most refreshing drink I've ever known."
I think he meant for my husband and I to grow closer, become stronger, love deeper. I think God meant for us to find the fortitude within ourselves to get up every time infertility knocks us down. I think God meant for our medical community to discover medicines, invent medical equipment, create procedures and protocols. I think God meant for us to find a cure for infertility.
No, God never meant for me not to have children. That's not my destiny; that's just a fork in the road I'm on. I've been placed on the road less traveled, and, like it or not, I'm a better person for it. Clearly, God meant for me to develop more compassion, deeper courage, and greater inner strength on this journey to resolution, and I haven't let him down.
"Frankly, if the truth be known, I think God has singled me out for a special treatment. I think God meant for me to build a thirst for a child so strong and so deep that when that baby is finally placed in my arms, it will be the longest, coolest, most refreshing drink I've ever known."
-author unknown-
I know from our own experience that God can take a struggle like infertility and use it to make you stronger as a person, stronger as a couple, and draw you closer to Him. But sometimes it feels like the struggle just keeps knocking you down.
One of my favorite Christian songs says "I am not skilled to understand what God has willed, what God has planned." But even amidst the truth of that statement, today I cannot help but ask God "why?" a lot.
Lord, I cannot make sense of this situation, but I know that You are still God. Please comfort my friends in their loss. Help them to cling to each other and to You.
Beautiful post. thank you for sharing that essay as well.
ReplyDeleteJody, this is just heartbreaking. I'll be praying for the parents.
ReplyDeleteOh, I cried reading Rebecca's post too. I LOVE that statement, it's so true. And I love the song, "I am not skilled to understand ..." I actually just quoted that song in my journal last week.
ReplyDeleteHugs!